THE CINCINNATI REDS
Pitching: If before last season you told me that Bronson Arroyo would lead the majors in innings pitched and Aaron Harang would be third in innings pitched and second in strikeouts I would have been absolutely taken aback. Taken aback, I say! Verily, those men pitched very well for the Reds last year and both earned semi-lucrative extensions. But its unfortunate they won't repeat their combined success. Look for at least Arroyo's numbers to falter a tad for a team that will feature Eric Milton, Kyle Lohse, and Elizardo Ramirez at the back end of the rotation. Yikes. Bottom line: Cincinnati was 14th in staff ERA last year even despite Arroyo's and Harang's stats, ergo things are not looking that rosy. But it could be worse. They could have Paul Wilson and Kirk Saarloos waiting in the wings for a spot start or two. Oh, wait.
Bullpen: Remember that quixotic Gary Majewski trade last year where the Reds pretty much gave the Nationals Austin Kearns and Felipe Lopez? The Reds traded something else in that deal. Their dignity. Other than the sore-shouldered Majewski, the Reds have a decent pen in Dave Weathers, Todd Coffey, and Rheal Cormier, but with "Everday" Eddie Guardado sidelined until July (irony?) due to Tommy John Surgery they haven't yet found their closer for the time being. And somehow that's still not enough justification to sign Kerry Ligtenberg.
Hitting: Take a guess who lead the Reds in VORP last year. If you guessed Adam Dunn or Ken Griffey, you're wrong. If you guessed Ryan Freel, you're an idiot. It was Rich Aurilia. Yes, the current first baseman for the San Francisco Giants. That Rich Aurilia. Amazing, right? What with Dunn hitting somewhere near the Mendoza line and Griffey turning in a subpar, truncated season, it's not so hard to believe. But I'm not here to be negative. Dunn, for all his striking out still walked 112 times and had his third straight 40 homerun season and Griffey will continue to hobble his way to 600 homers and the Hall of Fame. Freel finally has an everday spot and a chance to showcase his speed and/or his prowess with the craigslist honeys. David Ross will get more time behind the plate, where he hit a solid 21 homers in 247 at-bats and the youth movement (Edwin Encarnacion and Brandon Phillips) should progress nicely, especially the young, and talented, Encarnacion.
Miscellaneous: Can we talk for a moment about last year's Bronson Arroyo for Wily Mo Pena deal? Can we? First the Sox rope-a-dope Arroyo into signing a below market contract and then they send him off for a huge, power-hitting, no-defense, outfielder when they already have two guys just like him but with more talent. The 2006 season proves Arroyo to be one of the best pitchers in the NL and proves Pena to have the Pedro Cerrano-like inability to hit a breaking pitch or accurately judge the strike zone. Fast forward a year and Arroyo signs a nice extension and the Red Sox bury Pena behind J.D. Drew, forever stunting any progress or development on his end. I say the Sox trade Coco Crisp, put Pena in centerfield next to Manny Ramirez, and just play the theme song to the Benny Hill Show over the loudspeakers. I know this has nothing to do with the Reds, but it definitely can be filed under miscellaneous.
Reds-related Ridiculous Proposition Bet: In lieu of a proposition bet, I wanted to make you all aware that one of the many nicknames for the city of Cincinnati is "Porkopolis." Gross. And you wonder why the terrorists hate us.
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Addendum: I forgot to mention Josh Hamilton.
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