The coin lead me to a double digit performance last week (10/16) with designs towards a similar result this week (9/15 so far, I have the Giants +3.5 tonight in Jacksonville) and that is quantum leaps better than I have been doing. Just this week the coin was right about San Francisco, Oakland, and Buffalo. Without the coin I would have probably taken the Spurs, Lakers, and Timberwolves, and those are NBA teams in completely different cities. What this all boils down to is that I am stupider than a quarter.
And speaking of stupid quarters and nonsensical segues, how about them Cowboys (and this time I don't mean it ironically)?! That may have been the first, and last, time I ever actively cheer for the single most hated franchise in football, but what a performance. Parcells did what Belicheck should have done: he ran the ball. Thirty one rushes from his two runningbacks and five more from Tony "I can't believe people think I'm dating Jessica Simpson" Romo to only 23 pass attempts (of which Romo completed 19!). That's how you beat the Colts and their 6"5," 230 lbs. quarterback with the laser, rocket arm. Go ahead, Ian, make a case for Drew Bledsoe now. Please, I want to hear it.
Question for you: How do you think Ashlee Simpson reacted when Terrell Owens said he'd like to double-date with Tony and Jessica? I say pre-rhinoplasty Ashlee: all for it. Post-rhinoplasty Ashlee: not a chance. What do you think?
I cannot think of more aesthetically deviated siblings than Jessica and Ashlee. Ashlee isn't too bad, but I have the feeling she's a strong candidate for the Kelly Clarkson Award, given annually to the celebrity that would be most unrecognizable without their makeup, or if not unrecognizable, at least make the viewer say, "No way!" at least three or four times. Jessica, meanwhile, speaking strictly physical, might be head-to-toe the most gorgeous celebrity alive. (By the way, is anyone else giddy about Britney Spears inevitably getting hot again? It's going to happen. I suggest getting on board on the bottom level, for otherwise you will waste the small window of gawkability before she finds husband #3 and has child #3.)
Anyway, the Cowboys are a very good team, and it seems Romo is the right quarterback for them. (Clearly, the Cowboys would have won by more than one possession last night if Bledsoe were QBing, but I won't get into that.) It just seems like the team has tried a lot harder of late. I didn't think teammates dislikes Drew Bledsoe, but perhaps that was the case. I'm not surprised with the results of the last five weeks, though I did expect them to lose a nailbiter last night. As you know, since pre-season, I've been a proponent of the Cowboys making noise in the playoffs this year, maybe even making a run at the Superbowl. I backed off that a bit when they were struggling, but this is the team that I expected. They have everything it takes to be an elite football team, except an experience quarterback. But Roethlisberger, Brady, and Warner weren't experienced either.
How do you see the NFC stacking up heading into the playoffs? This McNabb injury might clear the way for another playoff team that we didn't see coming. Thoughts?
Even before the McNabb injury the Eagles were not looking great in terms of the playoff picture, but now there's absolutely no question. The only thing this team has to look forward to is going to Dallas on Christmas Day where new Eagles starting quarterback Jeff Garcia can get reacquainted with former teammate Terrell Owens, who called him gay in a Playboy interview. Okay, so maybe the Eagles aren't looking forward to this as much as I am.
What this injury does is just take down one of the seven possible playoff teams in the NFC, leaving six to make it in almost by default: New York, Dallas, Chicago, Carolina, New Orleans, and Seattle. Some permutation of those six teams will fill out the seeding come playoff time. Philadelphia, Atlanta, San Francisco(!), St. Louis, Minnesota, one or more steps behind those six, are all 5-5 or worse. Of that lot, Atlanta probably has the best chance to make the playoffs, but they will have to win at least four, probably five, of their last six games against New Orleans, Washington, Tampa Bay, Dallas, Carolina, and Philadelphia. And this is a team that has lost three consecutive games to Detroit, Cleveland, and Baltimore. Maybe they can go 4-2 against those teams, but relying on the Falcons to play consistent football is like relying on these commercials to sell Macs.
And speaking of relying on things to do things, how about relying on LaDanian Tomlinson to score touchdowns? Anybody who drafted Larry Johnson ahead of him in fantasy football should be smacking their heads against their desks and anybody who drafted Shaun Alexander ahead of him should be on suicide watch. Tomlinson bangs out touchdowns as if they were groupies waiting outside his hotel room on a Saturday night: methodically, precisely, and with a great stiff arm.
Give me your feelings on how the AFC is shaping up. Could the Patriots be on course to host the Denver Broncos in the first round of the playoffs? And if that's the case, how badly do they need to get at least the third seed in the AFC?
I completely agree with your assessment of the NFC. I think those are the six teams going. The Bears will get the homefield, but the running storyline of the second half will be who can secure that second first round bye. Steelers aside, winning the Superbowl without that first round bye is quite difficult. Until this past weekend, I had given Seattle the inside track on that 2 seed, noting how they practically wrapped up the division, they were getting healthy and their running back would have a lot of carries left in him, and they had a cake schedule...but then they lost to San Francisco. I don't think I'll back off the assertion as Seattle as the #2 team, but if the Giants win tonight, they'll be a game up. Seattle's head to head victory over the Giants might end up deciding who gets that bye. It'll take 11 wins from the G-Men to get it, and that's asking a lot from a banged up team.
In the AFC, I don't know what we can make of the Colts. I think since this is finally the year we think they can't do it, this will be the year they do do it. They've never had the no-respect card in their hand, and it seems every champ from the last 6 years has played it. It's a pre-req to a Superbowl. They have the top seed, count on it. The road to the Superbowl goes through the RCA dome...just like last year when the Steelers safely traversed the road in a howitzer.
That 2 seed comes down to Baltimore, San Diego, Denver, and New England. (Chicago, Indy, and those four teams make up the best six teams in football. Once again, the AFC has five of them. What else is new?)
You could make a case for all of the other teams to take that second spot. Handicapping the race:
- San Diego is the best of the bunch and is tied with Baltimore for the top record of the four.
- Baltimore also has the top record, AND defeated San Diego head to head, but lost to Denver head to head. But they're just not as good as San Diego and will lose twice traveling to Cincy, KC, and Pitt.
- New England is a game back of these teams and loses out on the tiebreaker to New England. However, if they can defeat the Bears this weekend, they have the easiest schedule of the lot. (seriously: Detroit, Miami, Houston, Jax, Tennesee. Seriously serious.) They'll need to win all of them, though, as they already have three conference losses.
- Denver is one game back and has the tie breaker over New England AND Baltimore, but they do not have the tiebreaker on San Diego.
So, I think New England finishes at 12-4, good enough for the 3 seed behind San Diego. Baltimore drops two AFC games, gets the 4 seed and a first round hosting opportunity vs. Denver. New England draws whoever can squeeze themselves in at the 6 seed. My question to you, Saj: Who will that team be?
I'm not one to shy away from bold, ridiculous predictions. So my bold ridiculous prediction for the sixth AFC playoff spot: either the Jets, Bengals, Jaguars, or Chiefs. One of those four.
The Jets have a cakewalk schedule in Houston, Green Bay, Buffalo, Minnesota, Miami, and Oakland. However, they suck more balls than a crackwhore on Christmas. The Bears defense is good, but is it good enough to make Chad Pennington piss himself the way he did? Granted Chad Pennington probably pissed himself at Saw III, so the answer is no.
I got an interesting email from Jim (a Bengals fan) in Dayton, Ohio after they beat the Saints this weekend, "Hey jerkoff, it's Jim, a Bengals fan, from Dayton, Ohio. How you like us now, m*****f*****! HUH! Ocho Cinco, m*****f*****, Ocho m*****f****** Cinco!! CARSON PALMER RULEZ! M*****F*****!" Of course I made that fan email up because nobody reads this aside from Ian, and I never said anything disparaging about the Bengals, but Jim I think you are right on the money (except "RULEZ" should be spelled with an "S"). Chad "Ocho Cinco" Johnson is back to his bad motherlovin' self and that offense put up 72 points in the last two games. But to make the playoffs they have to win at least four more games, and that may prove difficult with Baltimore, Indianapolis, and Denver on the schedule (not to mention Pittsburgh in Week 17 potentially playing the spoiler). M*****f*****.
If the Jaguars can beat the Giants tonight, they will be 6-4 heading into week twelve. Assuming they steal one of their three tough games in the last six weeks (Indy, New England, Kansas City) and beat the teams they should beat (Buffalo, Miami, Tennessee) Jacksonville is looking at 10-6 and a probable spot in the playoffs. However, three of their four losses have come at the hands of Houston (3-7) and Washington (3-7) and the Jaguars actually beat Philly and Dallas when both teams were playing decent to good football. What does all of this mean? That nothing makes sense and a Jaguar team that does not beat the Giants tonight won't make the playoffs.
Ah, the Chiefs. The quietest 6-4 team in football and my pick for the final seed in the playoffs. Competent defense, freakishly talented runningback, and the Concussion Kid Trent Green is back in the saddle. Not only has this team beaten San Diego, Seattle, and St. Louis, they lost to Denver by only three points in Denver. Week 12 sees the Broncos coming to Arrowhead and given KC's track record in the AFC West, the winner will emerge as the number two in that division. If I were San Diego, and wanted the breathing room a Chief win would give me, I would send Shawne Merriman's trainer to Kansas City right away. Not an easy schedule (Denver, Cleveland, Baltimore, San Diego, Oakland, Jacksonville) but the Chiefs are good enough to handle business.
Ian, I know you don't hate the Jets as much as me so they must be your pick.
First, more people read this and you know it, so stop trying to illegitimatize our blog. (And I think you hurt our readers' feelings calling them no one.)
I was definitely taking the Chiefs for one simple reason: They're the best of the rest. They're great at home, they have a top workhorse running back, and a good regular head coach. They should get in, and as a Pats fan, that worries me.
The Jets, meanwhile, are a bad football team, and don't let your fellow New Yorkers tell you differently.
Good work. To our readers, we'll be back midweek, with some more football and some Red Sox offseason talk.
