Football Friday: Week 3

Standings after two weeks:

Standings.....GB
Ian 6-2.......... --
Saj 3-5.......... 3


I won't feel safe until Saj is at least 14.5 games back with three months to play. Because that kind of lead is insurmountable in sports.

Saj, good luck making up ground with these picks:

Miami Dolphins at New York Jets (Sunday, 1:00)
Minnesota Vikings at Kansas City Chiefs (Sunday, 1:00)
Cleveland Browns at Oakland Raiders (Sunday, 4:05)
New York Giants at Washington Redskins(Sunday, 4:15)

The "luck", friend, will need to be good for YOU. Yes. You.

St. Louis Rams at Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Sunday, 1:00)
Cincinnati Bengals at Seattle Seahawks (Sunday, 4:05)
Jacksonville Jaguars at Denver Broncos (Sunday, 4:05)
Carolina Panthers at Atlanta Falcons (Sunday, 4:15)


Miami Dolphins at New York Jets

I know what you're thinking, Ian. But I've learned a thing or two over the offseason- namely that it's okay to pick the Jets every once in a while. Roommate, and Jets' apologist, Rob is going to the game this weekend and he was excited because "they actually might win this one." Oh, to be a Jets fan. A year ago I would have opted to pick against the Jets with blatant disregard for whomever they're playing, but Rob's defeatist attitude has turned me, slightly. Think of this more as a sympathy nod than anything. Sympathy sidenote: No sympathy for Mangini when he goes 4-12 and loses the "Man-genius" title. Wake up, New York, the Jets scored 23 more points than they allowed last year. They're no good. But Miami is worse.
Minnesota Vikings at Kansas City Chiefs

Really? Kansas City is terrible. And Minnesota has the second coming of Tony Dorsett in Adrian Peterson. By the way, how much must it suck to be a Chiefs fan? Your franchise running back holds out all of training camp, the feel good story of the last few months (Priest Holmes) fails to make his comeback, you're 0-2 in competent quarterbacks, and HBO chose to profile you in training camp just before a 1-15 season. It's like watching the two months of a junkie's life before he goes on the 17 week bender that will leave his broken, emaciated carcass propped up against a dumpster in an alley.

Cleveland Browns at Oakland Raiders

Cleveland. I have a story to tell everyone. Ever since Derek Anderson's 5 touchdown performance Ian has been consistently trying to pawn him off on my in our fantasy league. And that's just insulting. Yes, I know my quarterbacks are Brett Favre and Kyle Boller. But still, shame on you, Ian. Shame on you.

New York Giants at Washington Redskins

Why do you keep doing this to me? For some reason I think the Giants are good. Maybe it's the uniforms. They do have nice ones. It's high time I realize that they aren't good. And Washington, somehow in someway, is better. If Brett Favre and Tony Romo can pick apart the Giants defense like they did then Jason Campbell will throw for 600 yards and 12 touchdowns this week. All to Santana Moss. And I will win my fantasy game by just starting him and no one else. So it has been said, so it shall be done.


I'll jump right into the picks after I say this: I successfull traded Derek Anderson today.

St. Louis Rams @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Two lousy teams here. As I foreshadowed last week, the Rams are clearly on their way down. This is the first time they opened 0-2 since Kurt Warner's squad tried to rebound from the Superbowl loss against New England. Do you think the Rams are starting to regret giving an enormous contract to a system quarterback who has a 54% completion rate after two games in St. Louis' dome? Now they go on the road. Not that the Bucs are any good, but at least they beat a talented New Orleans team last week. Pick: Tampa Bay

Cincinatti Bengals @ Seattle Seahawks: Two talented offensive teams, and the Bengals probably have the better offense. However, the Seahawks have two things going for them. One, they're playing in one of the more advantageous home fields in football. Two, they didn't give up 51 points to the Cleveland Browns. This postgame is loaded with "The Bengals have given up 90 points in the last two weeks" potential. Pick: Seattle

Jacksonville Jaguars @ Denver Broncos: Denver is without a doubt the luckiest team in football over the first two weeks...except for the Chargers and Jets, who are lucky the Patriots didn't beat them by 35 points each. I fully expect this to be a close game. And I fully expect the Broncos to once again come out on top. Pick: Denver

Carolina Panthers @ Atlanta Falcons: I'm sick of people trying to be optimistic about the Falcons. They're simply not that good, especially their offense, defense, and special teams. Stop picking them, everyone; even if they're at home. Word to the wise: wait until they win a game before picking Atlanta. Pick: Carolina