Editors' note: Every week, these two idiots will play a Pick 'Em NFL game. The object is for each editor to pick four seemingly even NFL matchups from the upcoming weekend, challenging the other pick to the winners. A running record will be tallied. Feel free to play along at home. Leave comments with your own picks if you want to go on the record.
Standings (Last week in parenthesis)
Ian 11-5 (3-1)
Saj 9-7 (3-1)
6:50 AM
I: Look at our records. If this were the NFL,I'd be coasting to a 2 seed and first round bye. You'd be scoreboard watching hoping to get in on some cheap tie-breaker. Man, you're cheap. See if you can make headway with these (I'm definitely trying to bait you with one of these):
Buffalo at Detroit (Sunday 1:00pm)
Philadelphia at New Orleans (Sunday 1:00pm)
Miami at NY Jets (Sunday 4:15pm)
Kansas City at Pittsburgh (Sunday 4:15pm)
11:08am
Talk big while you can, Ian. It's only two games. Speaking of only two games, there are only 13 games on the NFL schedule this week. Six teams have byes. Six teams! I'm not sure why this is alarming to me but it is. Anyway, here are your games conejo:
Carolina at Baltimore (Sunday 1:00pm)
NY Giants at Atlanta (Sunday 1:00pm)
Seattle at St. Louis (Sunday 1:00pm)
Houston at Dallas (Sunday 1:00pm)
Have fun with that last one.
1:27 PM
Two gimmies and two tough ones, therefore the best you can do in the overall standings this week is tie me. Thanks for a stressless Sunday.
Game 1: Carolina @ Baltimore: One of the tough ones. I think Baltimore may have peaked at 4-0, but they're still a good team. The problem is, Jamal Lewis isn't as good as I thought he was. Combine that with average or below average players at every other offensive position (sans the above average Todd Heap) and the Ravens won't be making too much noice down the stretch. They can beat Cleveland twice and maybe even Pittsburgh twice to finish at 10 wins, but this is not a good team - just a good defense. I see Carolina having a very difficult time putting points on the board in Baltimore. If someone were to offer them a total of 13 points for the game, take it or leave it, they'd take it. McNair, like in Weeks 3 and 4, does juuuust enough to win. Pick: Baltimore
Game 2: NY Giants @ Atlanta: One of the gimmies. Atlanta has shown to be the better team in ever facet of the game with the possible exception of quarterback. (And I mean possible, but come on, Vick can't hit receivers.) Add in home field advantage and it's a lock. Pick: Atlanta
Game 3: Seattle @ St. Louis: One of the toughies. Seriously. I don't know who's going to win this game. If we had a spread, I'd take the dog Rams because they get three points. Straight up though, this is really tough. If Shawn Alexander were playing, I'd give it to the Seahawks, but with Morris in their running game, I'm not confident. On the Rams side, there are legit weapons all over the offensive side of the ball, and the Seahawks will look to keep pace with a growing score. Look for Seattle to use a lot of 4 Wide Receiver sets and make it a track meet on the St. Louis turf. Shootout here, and the team with the better coach, quarterback, and receivers win. Pick: Seattle
Game 4: Houston @ Dallas: Please. If it weren't for Oakland traveling to Denver, this would be the lock of the week. This is only Dallas' second home game, and I like them putting up close to 40 points here. Look for a couple T.O. T.D.'s. Pick: Dallas
2:49pm
The Giants game is not a gimmie, but I'm glad you think so you overconfident ass. On to the picks...
DETROIT
I am not making this pick because Jon Kitna is the starting QB for both of my fantasy teams. Again, that is NOT why I am making this pick. Okay, this is why I am making this pick. Admitting that Jon Kitna cannot beat the Buffalo Bills at home is the same as admitting that my fantasy teams are terrible. And that is something, however true, that I refuse to admit. One of my teams also has Kevin Jones. Shoot me.
PHILADELPHIA
Who doesn't love Reggie Bush? Nobody. Nobody doesn't love Reggie Bush. He is really effing good. It's too bad the Eagles are better.
MIAMI
This is a stupid pick. A very stupid pick. But Miami has to finally win a game within their division (right?) and there's no better time than Joe-Joe's second start as a Dolphin. Well there could be a better time. Like when they Green Bay. Or when they play Detroit. But I can't pick the Jets. Ever. I don't care if the Tuna Bowl rivalry has been dead for nigh six seasons, any time I can see the Jets and Jets fans suffer, I take it. So this pick would be doubly satisfying. J-E-T-S!! S-U-C-K!!
KANSAS CITY
This was a tough pick and a great example of why someone who knows absolutely nothing about football (i.e. my friend Lindsey) probably picks this game correctly more often than someone who thinks they know something about football (i.e. me). So I let her do it for me. I was probably going to overthink it and end up picking the Steelers after predicting that this is the game where Ben Roethlisberger finally adds 2+2 and gets 4. But I would be wrong. P.S. as a backup, I flipped a coin. It landed tails: Kansas City. Just too many random determinants coincide here for me to pick against them.\
Good luck, and go Texans.
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